Archive for July, 2009
The Flip Flop of Change
When my growing girls flip flopped between the comfort of playing with dolls and then reaching out to try on lipstick, my view was compassionate amusement.
Now I am the one flip flopping and I am not feeling particularly compassionate, or amused.
Today I am flat out blue. One of those girls is leaving home to start a life in Washington, DC.
She is determined, lovely, eloquent and brave enough to have made the decision without having a job. All this while friends have been telling her she was foolish.
Well everyone has their opinion, what I know is that we respect people who take chances, go ahead, and believe that it will work out, and it has; and all my pride is not banishing the blue.
So why am I so blue? This daughter has not been in the house for more than a month at a time for the past four years. Recently graduated from college, she has been home for five weeks, just the two of us, and the dog and the cat.
I have more time now. I am not doing the drive bys (this is where you are in such a hurry to get to your appointment, you leave your kid somewhere and then call on the cell phone to make sure they got in). Yes, I was often a crazed single-parent.
For five weeks I have enjoyed folding her laundry, feeding her, hearing about her day. I like all of that, but seriously. I need to dig deeper. Do I feel guilty? Do we parents ever do enough? Am I afraid I won't have enough going on when she is gone? (If you know me, you are laughing here).
I did not cry when either daughter went to kindergarten or college, and I always make jokes about the way mother eagles push their young ones out of the nest and they either make it or Not! Today I cried after I dropped her off at work.
This blue is another curtain closing on my role as Mom. It is another nail in the passing of youth. I can deny the unease of touching my toes, by not trying, but it is impossible to deny that the flipping between busy-Mom and free-Mom is ending.
Does this make me a crone? I love crones, but I am not ready to be one; the title is still for other people. I love being a Mom.
To make matters more intense, I have been sorting family pictures.
Part of this transition is a craving for order. The feng shui consultant has come and gone, and I have projects. I want to enter the next phase peacefully and free of any clutter.
Whew, I do feel better. It is ok to flip flop between happy, sad, and proud.
I did the best I could do, and eagle moms are smart, so out you go girl! Tomorrow, I am buying all of the girls in my family new lipstick!
Change Your Mind About Twitter?
After rolling my eyes and playing dead over all of the twitter hoopla, I am now a mesmerized fan. Yes, I shifted my stubborn stance and changed my mind…….whew
Six months ago I said to Sandy Jones-Kaminski, the Miss Manners of networking and early Twitter fan, "I mentioned Twitter to my kids and they asked, What is that?"
Now my recent college graduate tweets every day….all day! As I write, I hear the tweet of her TweetDeck. I showed her the possibilities and then I had the delicious pleasure of hearing tell a friend, "My Mom knows more about Tweeting than I do."
That girl used to call me techno-babe and roll her eyes. OK. End of my mid-life bloviation.
What is so fascinating about Twitter? and TweetDeck? Well, TweetDeck is the mother lode of eavesdropping. Do you want to know what is the word on the street for iPhones? a book? a movie, traffic, the Tour de France, the MJ special you weren't watching. You can find out in real time. And it keeps at it while you are off doing other things.
Search anything: At&T, organic cherries, Wii Fit and find out what people are really saying.
Do you have any idea how many people put Wii Fit back in the box after it calls them obese?
You can easily make twitter a personalized news feed. Your own international and local associated press feed without interference. Whatever eclectic interest you have, that you want someone, anyone, to talk to about, you can find that someone on Twitter.
Facebook is a virtual neighborhood. You create a community and you put on your Mr. Rogers sweater and check in to see what your friends are doing. You are at your neighbor's kitchen table, or on the front porch in a small town and you learn a lot about what is going on, but your virtual neighborhood can span the globe.
Twitter has the potential to open your world a few more big notches. What will it become? Will it last? Who knows?
If the internet is the Wild West, then Twitter could be San Francisco.
You might want to check it out. I am off to check my Tweet Deck searches. I hope I find you there.
